Kids notice when adults around them are feeling stress, pressure, anxiety, or concern. 

Between changes in daily life stemming from COVID-19, the racial justice movement, political divisiveness, financial pressures, and more, kids are noticing when adults around them may be feeling different emotions. They don’t always know what to do about it or have the social and emotional skills developed enough yet to express themselves. Young children need to feel safe, supported, and informed as we grapple with these tough times. 

You can help. Approaching hard conversations with kids is very important. 

Here are a few ways we suggest to approach hard conversations:
  • Recognize their verbal and nonverbal cues. 
    • Our bodies can react physically to different emotions, and kids can demonstrate emotions in many ways. Sometimes kids behave differently under pressure and you can pick up on what they might be feeling when they haven’t yet said. Impulse control, for example, is a social-emotional skill that takes practice for kids. Be patient and recognize that their actions might be caused by underlying stress or other reasons.
  • Open the space for kids to acknowledge and name what they are feeling. 
    • Help them practice identifying emotions by asking what they’re feeling and what they think the other adults around them are feeling.
    • Ask them questions that are simple like, “What have you heard?” and “what are your questions or fears about that?
  • Validate their emotions. 
    • Saying something like “what you are feeling is ok” or “I understand, that is hard” is something simple that can go a long way. This can help increase their self-confidence.
  • Keep answers simple and honest.
    • Be clear about the facts, what is in your/their control and out of your/their control, and be reassuring about reasonable expectations using simple language.
  • Lead with empathy. Kids can learn empathy by modeling adults, so it is important to demonstrate you understand how they are feeling. To be truly empathetic take a deep listening role and try intentionally to avoid:
    • Dodging questions or discussions
    • Trying to show the bright/positive side to change their perspective
    • Minimizing their feelings or the problem
    • Advising how to fix the situation
    • Tell stories of similar situations
    • Try to out-rank their feelings or the problem with bigger problems
    • Blowing the problem or their feelings out of proportion.
  • A great way to reduce stress, increase connection, and to end hard conversations is by playing together. This can be one thing that helps a kid feel better. 

Here are some resources you can use to support your conversations. 

Political Divisiveness

Racial justice:

COVID-19: 

Supporting LGBTQ youth:

More Resources


woman and child smiling
woman and child smiling

August 17, 2022

How Adults Best Create Supportive Play Communities ›

With over 25 years of experience working with kids in schools, our staff and coaches have learned many things about how to set up the most positive, inviting, engaging play experiences. The lessons they’ve learned can be applied on the playground, in the virtual classroom, and at home. When you are setting up play environments…

students in circle playing game with ball
students in circle playing game with ball

August 17, 2022

Helping kids to find new friends and feel included ›

Play is a natural, safe way that kids can interact with people who are different and rejoice by achieving shared goals. Interacting with people who are different at a young age is good for kids. To make sure that kids have the opportunity to play with peers outside of their normal groups, adults or youth…

two girls playing rock paper scissors
two girls playing rock paper scissors

August 17, 2022

Empowering Kids to Create Their Own Happiness ›

By Playworks and UNICEF Kid Power® When kids’ minds and bodies get active, either while playing or participating in service learning, they experience physical and mental benefits (and support positive academic behaviors). One of the most important social-emotional outcomes is experiencing joy. Educators and families have risen to the challenge of ensuring kids get social-emotional…